


Begin Again

by NoirAngel011



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Lesbian Character, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Childhood Trauma, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Nightmares, Past Child Abuse, Post-Season/Series Finale, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Shadow Weaver | Light Spinner (She-Ra)'s A+ Parenting, Trauma, after the war
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:22:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27708974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoirAngel011/pseuds/NoirAngel011
Summary: After Adora has a nightmare, Catra has a few realizations. They have a conversation about what Shadow Weaver did to Adora, and what that means for her healing process after the war. Steps towards recovery are made and cuddles ensue.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 134





	Begin Again

**Author's Note:**

> WE. NEED. TO. TALK. ABOUT. ADORA’S. TRAUMA. TOO. SOMETIMES.  
> Look, I love Catra. That’s evident. This story is written from her POV after all. But we need to talk about Adora’s trauma and struggles too. I hardly see anyone touch on it and I feel that it’s important. I hope I did her some justice. This story hardly scratches the surface. When going through what that topic of this story could be, I kept thinking back to one quote from Noelle, that Adora thinks of her ponytail and jacket like a uniform. I felt like that’s such a big thing. She sleeps in that damn ponytail and we only see her without it twice, once in s4 after She-Ra’s gone and once in the future sequence of s5. So, I came up with this little story.  
> I also realized that I had never written a strictly Catradora story until now, so here’s one.

“No, no, no, stop…” 

Catra woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of mumbling. She rubbed at her eyes to push the haze of sleep away. She didn’t need her night vision to know where the noises were coming from. She pushed herself up into a sitting position and away from the plush bed. After she had moved into Adora's room, she had demanded that they replace the Horde-style bed with a regular soft Bright Moon one. It had taken some getting used to, but it was much nicer than the old bed, which was too small to sleep the both of them unless Catra curled up at her feet, and these days that spot was reserved for Melog.

Beside her, Adora tossed and turned, mumbling and crying out in her sleep. Some words were coherent, others were just gibberish to Catra.

Melog laid at their feet and had woken up as well, looking to Adora with a concerned expression on their face. Catra slowly reached out for Adora.

“No! Catra… Cat- catra?” Catra stopped at the sound of Adora crying out for her. She could only imagine what was going on inside her head. At a closer look, she realized that Adora had tears falling down her face in her sleep. Catra’s heart ached.

She wrapped her arms around the blonde, pulling her into her chest. She tried to rouse her, shaking her shoulder and tugging lightly on her hair to wake her up, but her tactics didn’t work. 

They would just have to wait this one out.

She tried her best to comfort her lover, rocking her gently and whispering sweet nothings to her. Adora had her face buried in Catra’s chest but was still trapped in her dream. Catra could feel her tears soaking into her tank top. 

She shook Adora a little harder.

“Adora, baby, wake up. Come on, wake up for me. It’s okay, I promise. You’re safe.” Catra ran her hand through Adora’s hair.

Adora startled awake a moment later. She jerked back, pushing herself out of Catra’s arms and to the other side of the bed. Her breathing was heavy and fast and there was a wild look in her eyes.    
Catra reached out to grab her hand.

“Adora! It’s okay! It’s just me. You’re okay. You’re safe,” she assured her, rubbing her thumb over Adora’s knuckles. She watched as Adora was finally able to focus on her, blue eyes overrun with tears.

Carefully, Catra pulled Adora back into her arms. She was shaking and tears streamed down her face silently. Catra pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

“It’s okay babe. It’s okay. He’s gone. It’s over. We’re safe. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.” Catra rubbed Adora’s back, trying to bring her back to herself. Her eyes were far away and distant and Catra bit her lip.

She pulled away slightly to study Adora a little closer. Melog got up and came over, curling themselves between Adora and Catra. Catra rested a hand on Adora’s cheek. 

“Adora? Can you look at me, sweetheart?” She gently stroked her cheek. Adora didn’t respond.

She was awake, but lost in her own mind and memories, Catra realized. She was going into shock.

“Adora, come on. You gotta focus on me. You’re okay. It’s over!” Catra could feel tears pooling in her own eyes now. She was scared, seeing Adora like this. She had never gotten like this after a nightmare. She usually just cried for a few minutes then went back to sleep. Catra feared that she had done something wrong.

Catra leaned forward and kissed her forehead, brushing a stray strand of hair out of her face.

“Adora?” She called.

Adora let out a choked sob and lunged forward, grabbing Catra into a hug and beginning to cry into her chest.

“C-Catra,” She whispered. Catra breathed a sigh of relief.

“It’s okay, I’m here. We’re okay. You’re safe,” she repeated, cradling Adora and playing with her hair.

She didn’t know how long they sat there. Adora’s cries blended in with the sounds of the waterfall in the corner of their room and Catra just tried to keep reassuring her that they were safe.

She had never seen Adora like this. She had never seen her so… broken. She wasn’t saying much, just crying into Catra’s fur.

She heard Adora sniff as her tears came to an end. She just didn’t have anything left to cry. Slowly, Adora peeled herself off of Catra.

“I’m sorry you had to see that,” she whispered, head hanging.

“Adora, no. Don’t apologize. It’s okay. You’ve seen me in fifty shades of ugly, it’s okay for me to see you in your not-so-perfect moments too. That’s what we signed up for when we decided to date, right?” Catra cracked a crooked smile, but apparently, she had crossed a line somewhere in her statement. Adora teared up again.

She buried her face into her hands, ponytail swinging at the sudden movement.

“Adora? Did I say something wrong?” Catra reached out and lightly gripped Adora’s shoulders.

“I’m- I’m not supposed to have not-so-perfect moments.” She caught Adora’s quiet words just barely, and she guessed that had she been anyone else she wouldn’t have heard them at all. Thank the stars for her cat-like hearing.

Catra’s heart shattered for Adora. She gently pulled her back into her arms. Adora didn’t fight her and instead melted into her embrace. Adora hugged her arms around her body as Catra held her.

“Adora, baby, no. I promise you that it’s okay. You don’t need to be perfect all the time. Fuck, you don’t even need to be perfect most of the time.” Catra kissed the top of her head. Adora choked on a sob.

“B-but Shadow Weaver always said-”

“Fuck what Shadow Weaver said! We established a long time ago that she should not be someone we listen to. Don’t let what she did to us- what she did to  _ you  _ dictate your life. She’s gone now. What she did was horrible, but she can’t hurt us anymore.  _ I’m  _ telling you that you don’t need to be perfect. Especially not when it’s just the two of us, alone in our room. Who are you gonna listen to? Me, or Shadow Weaver?”

Adora looked up at Catra with watery eyes. She looked conflicted. Catra rubbed her upper arm.

“Look, I know it’s hard to move on. She really hurt us. But now we need to be better than her. We need to make choices for ourselves. Adora, the only one hurting you now is you.”

Catra reached up to Adora’s ponytail.

“And we’re gonna start fixing that with this.” She pulled out the hair tie, letting Adora’s hair fall free around her shoulders. She tossed the hairband to the side, using the hand that wasn’t holding Adora to ruffle her hair and smooth it out.

“What?” Adora asked, looking down at her hair resting on her shoulders.

“You aren’t a soldier anymore, baby. You don’t need to wear a uniform. No more ponytail, at least not at night. It’s really hurting your hairline.” Catra laughed, dragging her fingertips along Adora’s hairline. Adora cracked a smile at that.

“Come on, let’s lay down.” She gently guided Adora to lay down, pulling the covers up around them. She hugged her as Adora snuggled into her chest.

“Tomorrow, we’re gonna take the day off. You need to relax.” She felt Adora stiffen at that.

“But we have work to do! Rebuilding, meetings, we have to bring those goods to Erelandia-” Adora was hushed by Catra’s finger on her lips.

“Etheria will survive without She-Ra for a day. I’m sure Arrow Boy and Sparkles can handle the meetings without us. You need your rest. If all else fails, Swift Wind can deliver the goods. It’ll be okay, Adora. Even 8-foot tall princesses need rest too.” Catra giggled. Adora looked hesitant but smiled too.

She lowered her head again, resting it on Catra’s arm. Catra carded a hand through Adora’s hair.

“It’s gonna be okay, Adora. If you need to, we can set up some sessions with Perfuma. I’m sure it would help. But for now, I’m always here for you. Bow and Glimmer are too. You don’t need to hide anymore.”

Adora nodded, blinking sleepily.

“I-I’ll try to stop listening to what Shadow Weaver used to tell me. But only if you don’t make me stop wearing my jacket. Not yet.”   
Catra shook her head.

“We can go at your own pace, Adora. I’m always going to be with you no matter how fast or slow that is.”  Catra carefully lifted Adora’s chin and kissed her. Adora kissed back, bringing one hand up to grapes at Catra’s. When they pulled apart, Adora smiled. "Just consider it a new beginning." Adora's smile widened and she leaned back in to steal another kiss.

“Thank you, Catra. I love you.” Adora clasped Catra’s hand in hers as she settled back gown against Catra and the pillow. Melog had fallen asleep between them and Catra let her tail drape over them and onto Adora’s thigh.

“I love you too, Adora.”

And in that moment, nothing else she had ever said had been more true.

**Author's Note:**

> We all know that her nightmare was about 5x05.  
> At least, I hope that was obvious...


End file.
